Thursday, December 27, 2012

The Antidote-- happiness for people who can't stand positive thinking

By Oliver Burkeman


Burkeman is in favor of a more balanced view of happiness-- not the unbridled optimism that is so popular. Burkeman is more stoic, or Buddist.

Some points to remember

The nonjudgmental, and non attached nature of Stoicism and Buddhism can be very useful to happiness.  Bad things happen all the time, even in this world of plenty. We have to embrace them and accept them. They didn't happen because we failed, because we weren't optimistic enough.

Be careful setting goals. We don't know the full consequences of choosing a goal. Sometimes planning like a frog-- leaping from lily pad to lily pad, rather that planning way ahead to a goal is much more effective. In some extreme situations, people have given up there lives to achieve a goal, rather than accept failure.

Get over yourself. 99.9% of everything you think and do is only for yourself.

Safety is as much a feeling as it is reality. Stopping at nothing to be safe, is not safe. It results in security theater. It results in us spending our time and money on things that only make us feel safe.

Failure happens. We can learn much from failure.

We all die. We'd be better off realizing that every day, rather than hiding from it.

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